My name is Nakia—and I’m a bum magnet—there, I’ve said it—and it is now out there for the world to see.  I keep attracting and “giving myself” to the wrong guys who either have no “true” interest in me, or are totally NOT worth my time – or anyone else’s for that matter.

So I am proclaiming my flaws and all like a recovering addict at an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting. I have an addiction – I have a “thing” for bad boys.  But with bad boys, comes bad behavior, which leads to bad dates, bad relationships and eventually – bad breakups.  And Lord knows, I have had my share.

I, like most single women in America, am addicted to “Sex and the City.”  I mean, I can spend an entire weekend watching the reruns and movies on cable television.  Carrie Bradshaw’s endless ups and downs with “Mr. Big” – being strung along for years on end – watching him marry and divorce someone else – and even being stood up on her wedding day is something many of us have gone through in some form or fashion.  But like Carrie, we all just keep holding on, waiting on that fateful day when Mr. Big sees you for who you really are – in all your splendor – and sweeps you off your feet and out of the land with the other single—but phenomenal—fairies.

We all want the fairy tale.  In fact, it is molded into our psyche as little girls.  It is just funny, that no matter how strong—how independent – or how fashionably rich and fabulous we grow up to be—we still hang on to the little girl fantasies in our mind.

I just recently watched Nicki Minaj’s “Moment for Life” video on an all-day video homage to her royal hotness…seriously, she is absolutely stunning….and I noticed; the entire video was a fairy tale about meeting the “right one.”

So I knew I wasn’t alone in my dreams and have far too much company when it comes to relationship nightmares.  There isn’t enough room in cyber space – or rather this introductory blog – for me to get into all that, but I know by the end of the experiment, you will have gotten to know me (and my past losers –oops, I mean lovers) very well.

Now, why the online experiment?  Because I have tried everything else!

Church:  Been there!

Supermarket:  Done that!

Nightclubs:  Honey, don’t EVEN get me started!

And thanks to Facebook—every first love, ex-boyfriend and “blast from the past” crushes have found new ways to waste my time – with the same old lines.  Foolish! 

But it seems that everyone around me is meeting their soul mates on online dating sites. 

I must admit, I thought online dating was for rejects, losers or the socially-challenged.  But I am starting to think that maybe—just maybe—they have the right idea and it is ME who is wrong.  Wouldn’t be the first time I have been wrong about A LOT of things.  After all, the last guy I was involved with told me (in casual conversation) that he was signed up with a couple of online dating services.  I just sort of sat there with the ***crickets*** buzzing in my brain thinking, “Well, I do be damned” – but yes, he was very detailed about how you can just meet up with your “potential” at a coffee shop (just to check out the merchandise) and if you don’t like what you see, you can just end it there on a nice note and would not be out of much money.  It really made me wonder if he actually ended things with me for a match he found on one of his sites. 

Oh well, on to finding my perfect mate – or at least the perfect date!

First things first…I am taking advantage of some of those “free trials” at some different online dating sites—then I will wait for the matches to roll in.  I am still very skeptical, but really think this will be very interesting.

Now about me…who am I exactly? 

I am a 35-year-old divorced, single mother of two young children, the owner and creator of this site, a college graduate, a digital media producer and journalist employed by one of Houston’s top television news stations… and I think I am a cutie…no joke!  My male cousin who is constantly horrified by my dating decisions lovingly describes me as a “ball of energy.” I love my close-knit family and I value the friendships with my female friends (my Girlz, as I call them.) 

I am a pretty good cook – just please don’t ask for any homemade cakes and pies—and I love margaritas and Tex-Mex food.

I was born and bred in Texas and am a true “Southern Girl” all the way from the thick thighs, the big hair and the Southern hospitality.  I love sexy clothes, high-heeled shoes and Mac makeup.  Sounds simple, right?  Hey, I got some flaws too!  I talk way to darn much (as you can see by this blog) and am a bit on the touchy-feely PDA side (that some people feel is a bit smothering) but hey, I am working on that!   To be honest, I have grown quite comfortable being single, but the inquisitive side of me wants to test the waters after hearing about all these great match-ups! 

Well, enough about me!

So why Denzel?  Well, honey why not?!  What red-blooded, heterosexual woman in America doesn’t have a “Love Jones” for that man?  But sadly, he’s taken, so the search is on for a “Denzel-like” man…in the mythical Greek God-like sense, of course.  🙂

Trust me, this is not about trying to find a man that “looks like” Denzel, but one who possesses the qualities that we women “dream” he has…or what he embodies during his public appearances (because only his wife knows what he is really like behind closed doors) – I am looking for a strong, ambitious, educated man with charisma, a quiet confidence, family-oriented, philanthropic, and yes—sexy as all get out!

Yeah…yeah…I know the saying, “Don’t look for love, let love find you.” And I totally agree.  I am just going on a little experiment to see if there are other “Denzels” in the real world.

To steal a quote from my favorite show:

“When it comes to relationships, maybe we’re all in glass houses, and shouldn’t throw stones. Because you can never really know; some people are settling down, some are settling and some people refuse to settle for anything less than butterflies.” 

I tell you this; I welcome butterflies and lightning bugs….flutters and fireworks lets you know you are alive.

Follow this blog every week for updates as I began “Searching for Denzel.”  I will talk about it all –the dates, the fashion, the food and you never know, I may even “kiss and tell.”  🙂

Do you think I will find my match?

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