Jada Pinkett Smith has always been known as beautiful, balls-to-the-wall tough and a force to be reckoned with.  She’s been both criticized and revered on how she handles both her marriage and her kids and, through her Facebook page, she is not only inspiring women her age, but educating the younger generation.  She just made me love and accept myself a little bit more.

I was obsessed with my weight for a while, cursing the curves that came with child birth, cursing the curves that came with — dare I say it—age!  My metabolism had slowed down, my frame was holding on to weight that I never had a problem with before and I was not the “Skinny Minnie” that I used to be. I never had to diet, exercise was a non-factor and I never imagined that my clothing size would move into the double-digits.  When it did, I went through a panic phase.

After all of the yo-yo dieting, on-again/off-again sessions with my personal trainer and making excuses out the yin-yang, I finally just looked at myself for what I was…. an aging WOMAN, with a beautiful body that I should both accept and learn to take better care of.

My curves tell my story.  They say I have walked a path that I am proud of; they have given me a badge that I proudly wear today.  They came…when I became…a MOTHER!

And with being a mother, I have become more of a woman than I ever thought I could be:  strong, proud, beautiful…and like Mrs. Smith… a force to be reckoned with.  I no longer desire to be that young girl, carefree and foolish, even with the adolescent face and petite waist.  I still have a good frame, and I hear that my curves are “in all of the right places,” but I refused to accept that for such a long time.  Sometimes we lose our self-esteem when we try to fight the inevitable.  With age truly comes wisdom, and with wisdom, there may be a couple of extra laugh lines and a gray hair, or two.  But we, as black women, have been blessed with skin that ages gracefully, something we have in our favor.

I do tell you this, there is nothing more beautiful than a “mature” confident woman and the physical sex appeal does not diminish, either, if you take care of yourself.  I am in my latter-30s and, when I do enter my 40s, I will do so with grace, beauty and confidence.  Jada’s open letter on Facebook told women to stop being afraid to grow up.  Beauty is …and will…remain everlasting.  Thanks for the words of encouragement, sistah.

Read the entry below, courtesy of the Jada Pinkett Smith Facebook page.

Don’t be afraid to be grown…

How many of us are afraid to grow up because we fear that we will no longer be attractive…desirable?

Last night I got to have some girl time with one of my favorite women. She is a gorgeous woman who has been a light in this industry for two decades. We are both now in our forties, but I found myself more mesmerized by this woman’s beauty now than when we were in our twenties. During our conversation, I realized that her beauty had DEEPENED from all the wisdom she has collected from her years of experiences. It’s a beauty that has been earned. A beauty that a twenty year old can’t possess until she has paid the price of…evolution, of transformation, of having rose from the ashes of a thousand rebirths.

I thought to myself…this is the new phase of beauty that maturity brings. It’s a beauty that has learned to build and rebuild hearts. A beauty that can sustain all that is substantial. It’s a beauty that we, culturally, rarely exalt, rarely recognize or give praise to. Culturally, we hound exterior youth but… it’s our deepening, our self-actualizing, that creates the beauty…that lasts…for eternity.

Don’t be afraid to be GROWN. It’s beautiful;)

Happy Sunday…


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