We fight, we roll our eyes, we cry, we vent about each other to some “other friend” vowing we will never speak to each other again – but guess what – we MAKE UP and then play catch up on all of the things we missed telling each other when we were “mad.”
Well, that is the role of the best friend..and for many women, when you have been “besties” for so long, you are more like sisters, so you know there is some bickering and hair-pulling…lol.
I love my best friends and Lord knows we get on each other’s nerves. How could we not, we’ve been friends since we were in grade school and have been through every stage of life together. FYI, one of my friends will NEVER let me live down my “blue eyeliner” phase and I will never let her live down the day I rode the public bus with her for hours just so she could visit her “dumb” teenage boyfriend.
My other best friend thinks she is the sexiest vixen to walk the face of the earth — and I would agree—and she keeps me grounded on what life is REALLY all about while being the cheerleader every woman needs. She tells me in each and every conversation how much she believes in me and how proud she is. I love her and am proud of her too. Our other friend is so Hakuna Mutata that nothing can ever get her down. She rolls with the punches and toasts to the good life..even when the chips are down.
Then we have the true Marilyn Monroe friend.. my ride or die..who is down to go out, have a good time and never argue about a thing. I just love her!
Anywho…. I am saying all of that to say this – I was SHOCKED to run across an article saying that — these days — many people say they have NO BEST FRIEND!
An article on Today.com gives disheartening statistics of a recent study from the United Kingdom. That study says one in 10 people have no close friends.
The British data came from Relate, a nonprofit group dedicated to relationship counseling, which surveyed 5,000 people across the United Kingdom about the state of their relationships. While it found that most people report good relationships with families, friends and colleagues and four of five couples experienced a happy relationship, the study also revealed that as many as 5 million people in the U.K. might be friendless.
The study goes on to give a list of reasons for the lack of close friendships, including struggles with platonic intimacy, marriage or love relationships dominating time, having children, jostling work duties, etc.
But come on, people! You need someone to have your back from time to time — as long as they don’t stab you with the pointy end. LOL. What other group of nuts would dress in silly clothes with you, and flat out embarrass themselves all for the sake of an Instagram pic? You have to have friends — silly ones, goofy ones, in all shapes and sizes who love you just as you are.
I have so many wonderful women in my life that I can honestly call them ALL my “best friends.” I don’t think it has to be narrowed down to just one. No matter the amount of time that you’ve known a person, if they are there with you through the laughs and the pain (and the partying), then they are a needed addition.
I sit back in amazement when I think of all of the special people in my life.
The hard-working, loving one who will shut the house down if she hears anyone has said a negative thing about you, but will push your boo-hooing butt away when she sees you crying at her graduation. (Just trying to stay tough..hmph!)
The calm one who is the voice of reason and prays with you when you need it.
The one who master plans everything “to a tee” and makes sure you follow your plans — and her rules of etiquette! (My RSVP or else queen!)
The one who hugs you so tight every time she sees you, there isn’t a doubt in your mind that her love for you is real.
The one who takes has taken care of your babies as if they were her own.
The ones who juggles it all, and makes motherhood and sacrifice look like a cakewalk.
The one who can never stick to one hair style or color, but begins and ends every phone call with “I love you.”
The throwback “Foxxy Brown” sistah who was with you during the darker days and the shining nights!
The co-worker who became a prayer warrior, your rock and a sister for life.
The “healthy, fit and fine” one who kicks your butt into high gear anytime you need it — with love — of course.
And that friend you haven’t seen in 18 years, but is still as beautiful as she was the day she left. (Hint, hint: Girls trip better be in the plans!)
And of course, my best friends are also my family members. I would be nowhere without my supportive sister or my handsome cousin, who make it possible for me to “do what I do.”
That former sister-in-law who still considers you family long after……and will stay up with you into the wee hours of the morning discussing matters of the heart.
That crazy-as-me cousin who lets us talk him into our party shenanigans!
The baby cousin who still calls me “Ke Ke” while giving sound advice on love, life and BUSINESS!
And my dear cousin who I’ve looked up to all of my life. She celebrates every victory with me without missing a beat.
All I can say is this, I am a better woman because of my close, personal friendships, and I am blessed to say that I have more than one amazing woman in my life that I can consider a BEST FRIEND. And best friends are not just the old ones. God sent me a new “roadie” that I would trust with my life and we are linked at the hip terrorizing the community!
If you don’t have any friends, I suggest you re-evaluate yourself. Because after all, the people who have best friends are the ones who know HOW TO BE FRIENDS.
I pray that you are all as lucky as my friends and I are.
Now, want to read more of the study? CLICK HERE!
